Reversal of Fortune

A few years ago I booked a summertime party with my trio, at a swanky beautiful Park Hill Home. The backyard was a modern concrete multileveled wonder, with a long thin swimming pool, carefully covered with a tarp to discourage cannonballs. 

After telling the client that no, we could not haul our gear up to the balcony level using the ornate metal staircase, and no, we would not set up on a raft in the pool, we settled on a location near the patio door, tucked into the corner of the brick porch. Naturally, it being summer, I wore giant platform sandals and my entire focus whenever we broke was NOT FALLING DOWN. I teetered into the bathroom on break, but I Did Not Fall Down. We were offered party food (sushi), and I did not gallop to the table, which have inevitably meant falling sideways, then Down. I didn’t trip on the nest of cables surrounding the stage. I didn’t turn an ankle as I smiled and extended a hand to a guest. Not one bandmate sprayed food while talking. The music didn’t suck. We got compliments. We ran out of business cards. It was a great night, and I Didn’t Fall Down.

At the end of the evening I switched to my load out dress (in the car, because the bathroom was occupied) and realized I’d neglected to bring a pair of flats, so I had to break down the Bose tower and load the keyboard, stands, and bench in my giant shoes. I took fewer pieces and made more trips, and I Didn’t F. D. After the car was packed I returned to the courtyard, thanked the client like a grown up, joked a little with some guests, and paid the band. I even drove my stick shift home wearing those beasts. 

Still marveling in the afterglow of that perfect night, I clomped into the house and kicked off my heels, then caught sight of myself in the full length mirror. The shimmer of well being, the rosy glow of a job well done, and pride at impersonating a real live grown up all simultaneously cracked heads and shattered like poorly formed ice under a Zamboni. I looked behind me in the mirror to be sure, but yes it was true. My dress was inside out.